Speaker 1: 0:00

Fisheshow the podcast starts now with DJ Cornbread, aka the Empress. What's up y'all? It's your girl, dj Cornbread, and welcome back to Fisheshow the podcast, the space where we dig deep into stories that shape who we are, how we live and how we heal. So we're gonna dive into a very sensitive yet essential topic, talking about childhood trauma and how it impacts our lives as adults. So if you're listening to this, you may have experienced like childhood trauma yourself, or maybe you've witnessed how it shows up in the lives of people around you. In this episode, we'll talk about what childhood trauma really is, how it carries over into adulthood and, most importantly, what we can do to address it. Because, whether it's in your, it can be relationships, careers or mental health.

Speaker 1: 0:56

Trauma is something that many of us have to contend with at some point in our lives. I don't care who you are. At some point in your life you would have to contend with trauma. So before we go any further, I just want to remind you you are not alone in this. Nobody's ever alone in this. Healing is possible. I have been through a lot and some people know. If you know, you know, you know you don't, and there is hope.

Speaker 1: 1:20

So let's just start by breaking down what childhood trauma actually means. So trauma in this context refers to experiences in early childhood that leave lasting emotional, psychological or physical scars, stuff that you've run with like for your life. Life like run like you constantly think about it and it stresses you out and it's like constantly back there, no matter how you try to get away from it. It's just always an issue. You know that. That. That, well, that's what I'm talking about, you know. So it can be caused by a wide range of events like abuse, neglect, bullying, or even experience like a major life disruption, like a divorce or moving away from home or, you know, getting being so used to being with your family or being with their parent or a sister or brother, and then all of a sudden, it's just you, you know. But here's something important Trauma isn't defined by the event itself, but by how the person perceives and processes it. So what might be traumatic for one person could be something that another person navigates more easily.

Speaker 1: 2:41

Everybody doesn't deal with trauma the same way. The way we internalize these early experiences shapes how we see the world, ourselves and others. So think about it this way, like when we're children. We don't always have, let's say we don't always have the tools or or the emotional maturity to process complex situations. So you know you don't always you don't know what to do. As a child, you know so, like, as a result, our brains and bodies store these unresolved feelings, often subconsciously, like leading to patterns that you know can resurface in our adulthood. So, even though it happened when you were a child, then you start thinking about it later on, when you get older, like yeah, like damn, that's why that happens. So it's like, as we grow up, the effects of childhood trauma can follow us, often without us even realizing it. Like this can show up in, like our behaviors, our relationships and even how we approach our work in daily life. Honestly, you look if you think some people might not, but just think about it and that's a real ish. Like just think about it.

Speaker 1: 3:55

One of the ways trauma manifests in is through attachment issues, for example, say. Say if, if a child grows up in an environment where they feel neglected or abandoned, they might struggle with trusting others later in their life Because when they were younger they felt abandoned, they didn't have anybody, nobody loved them, they felt like nobody cared. So later on they're going to struggle with trusting other people in their life. So it might be hard for them to get in relationships, it might be hard for them to find friends, it might be hard for them to get along with family members. You know, you never know. It's just, it's like. This can make it difficult to form healthy, secure relationships as an adult, leading to things like anxiety, avoidance or even emotional dependency. So another way trauma shows up is through, I'll say, self-worth and self-esteem issues Because, say, maybe as a child you were told, say you were told you weren't good enough or maybe you weren't given the support you needed to develop your confidence. So as an adult, that lack of self-worth can manifest in feelings of inadequacy, imposter syndrome or like, or chronic self-doubt, like it'll make you doubt yourself a lot. Your feelings will be strong on yourself. You know when, with stuff like this. So it's like then there's like an emotional regulation.

Speaker 1: 5:26

Many people who experience childhood trauma. They usually struggle with managing their emotions in healthy ways. So this could look like, say, intense mood swings, like uh, irritability, or emotional outbursts, like one minute you okay and then the next minute you're like dang what's wrong, like are you, you're you straight, you know, and then some people might not understand or you might be in a relationship where you don't understand and know how to deal with the person that has that. That's why it's good, when you have friends or you're in a relationship, to talk and have these couple hour talks and stuff just between y'all or have a talk with friends or whoever you feel comfortable talking with if it's not the person you're dating or whatever the case may be, because you never know what a person's going through or what they haven't went through that have them acting the way that they're acting. And it might also show up as like shutting down or like suppressing emotions to avoid feeling vulnerable, which you know. That I mean. That's, I mean and I can. Yeah, that's, that's the big one, because like that's one thing, like some people suppress their emotions because they don't want to feel vulnerable or whatever.

Speaker 1: 6:31

So, and of course, it's like we can't forget the physical impact. So unresolved trauma can affect the body's stress response and, like they say, pressure can bust the body's stress response and like they say, pressure can bust the pipe. So you have to make sure just try not to stress, try to do what you need to do to heal or get that type of positive energy around you so you're not stressing and putting yourself and your body at risk and, you know, just leading to long-term health issues like chronic pain, fatigue and digestive problems, or even like conditions like heart disease or autoimmune disorders. Like it's just you, it still plays a role, trauma plays a role. So, to make it a bit more relatable, like, let me share, I'm gonna share a couple of these examples with you guys. So like, uh, these, these are some stories I've heard over the years and this will illustrate, like, how trauma can show up in an adult, adult's life. So I'm not gonna put nobody out there and get y'all names, so just gonna make up some names, okay, so let's.

Speaker 1: 7:41

So let's say, let's say Sarah, so say Sarah, say that Sarah. She grew up in, say, she grew up in a home where her parents were emotionally distant and they rarely offered her praise or affection. She grew up thinking that she wasn't deserving of love, attention, like nobody cared about her. She just, you know, thought that she, you know, just was nothing. Nothing was there. So then let's fast forward to her 30s and she's an adult and she has. She's achieved a lot, she's successful in her career, but when it comes to relationships, she pushes people away. She has a hard time accepting love or intimacy because deep down she still believes she's not worthy of it. That could be one.

Speaker 1: 8:32

So then let's say another situation. Use the guys for example. Say that's, say James. So say James was a victim of severe bullying when he was a child. When he was in his childhood he was teased a lot, constantly about his appearance. You know, he's a personality like they just always talked about him and it was just always. He just never want to go to school. He was just, you know, as a child stressed. But I know he's stressed so fast, forward, forward. He's in his 30s. This is kind of thing to experience. This has led him to develop anxiety and low self-esteem as an adult. So he's now constantly worried about being judged by others and he struggles with social situations. So it's like, despite being very talented in a career, he often feels like he's an imposter or like is terrified of people finding out he's not good enough.

Speaker 1: 9:34

But both of them the Sarah and James situation, the examples or whatever that's basically how a childhood trauma can quickly shake an adult's life, since it refers to deeply distressing experiences that we had as a child, like I said, such as abuse, emotional, physical or sexual neglect, loss of a parent, witnessing violence or growing up in a chaotic, unsafe environment. These events can leave long-lasting effects on a person's brain development, emotional regulation and a view on the world. So some of those key areas that we talked about today that can affect you in your adulthood. Once again, emotional regulation adults may experience intense emotions, mood swings or emotional numbness, difficulty calming down after being upset or becoming easily overwhelmed.

Speaker 1: 10:25

Your relationships attachment issues clinginess like avoidance or fear of intimacy. Difficulty trusting others. Patterns of unhealthy relationships or fear of abandonment. Self-esteem and identity. Negative self-image or chronic self-doubt. Feelings of shame, worthlessness or not being enough. Your mental health higher risk of anxiety you get a higher risk of depression, ptsd or substance use. Intrusive thoughts or flashbacks, especially like with unresolved trauma. Nothing if it's not resolving you, it's constantly an issue. Behavioral patterns people pleasing or conflict avoidance. Uh, professionalism or chronic procrastination like hyper independence, relying only on oneself due to past disappointments like might just only. That's why you always rely on yourself to do certain things because of disappointments of others from your past. Physical health chronic stress leads to issues like insomnia, fatigue, digestive problems or autoimmune disorders. So the science behind it is like childhood. They believe childhood trauma impacts the developing brain, like I said previously. So your decision making, your memory, all of that can lead to all of this and it has problems with your nervous system as well, keeping the body in like a fight, fight or freeze state of mind even when there's no threat.

Speaker 1: 11:57

So healing and recovery. You guys, please, seek therapy. I mean trauma-informed therapy. You know self-awareness, learning to recognize triggers and automatic reactions. You know meditation and mindfulness. You know practices, boundaries and relationships, building healthy boundaries. Seek supportive, nonjudgmental connections with people. Body based healing you know just and just. You know education and compassion, like understanding that that many adults struggle. You know from survival patterns, not personal feelings or whatever, but replacing shame with self-compassion. So childhood trauma doesn't define a person Once again, it does not define. You Never forget that but it does shape responses, behaviors and beliefs. So the good news is that healing is absolutely possible. The good news is that healing is absolutely possible. With the right support. Many people not only recover but grow stronger, more resilient and more connected to themselves and others.

Speaker 1: 13:02

Thank y'all for tuning in. I know it's been a lot. We have talked about a lot and I just want y'all to know like everybody goes through these things, so you're not alone. If you need someone to, to talk, to, just make sure you reach out to those. If you feel like nobody um is hearing you and you're constantly saying things you know and you, just you know you have no one like, just you know, just just reach out to therapists. I'll just say therapy, therapy, therapy. Because you know you don't want, you don't want the that next level to be the worst level. So all right, it's your girl, dj cornbread.

Speaker 1: 13:39

Y'all already know another good ep. I'm gonna have a special guest in the building next uh episode. My boy hb, gonna be here with me. Uh, the dollar heist company is gonna be in the building. So y'all look out for that ep coming, something coming next or whatever. Don't forget if you would like to be a guest on the show, hit us up on fashitshowtopodcastcom or you can hit me up on TikTok at fashitshowtopodcast. You're in the mix with the one and only celebrity, dj Korn Brand, aka the Empress. This my favorite. Look at how this princess sticks you ready In the mix with celebrity DJ Kornbrand. We'll be right back. I'm out.